RUFUS CATCH ALL

[laid]

[Imagine here the "I'm gonna pay you 100 dollars to fuck off" meme but it's Raven and Rufus and the text has been changed to say "not" before fuck off.]

Comments

[soulus]

Then I suppose I'm not most people.

[laid]

You know what, I really can't argue with you on that. Pretty sure I overheard you sayin' yer a demon?

[soulus]

Is that a problem?

[laid]

Not really? I mean, I haven't met a demon before, but you don't seem dangerous so much as... overly serious and a little prickly?

[soulus]

It doesn't matter what I am. All of us are on even footing here.

[laid]

Well, I suppose what with no one having magic that's true enough, but there's definitely people here more equipped ta deal with murder than others.

[soulus]

Are you one of them?

[laid]

[He's tempted to lie, but;]

Yeah. Unfortunately it's something that sorta comes with the job I've got.
[Not that he's gonna elaborate.]

[soulus]

[He won't ask.]

If this keeps up, it'll be fortunate.

[laid]

Don't say that, you'll jinx us.

[He doesn't want to have to be some sort of gruesome expert.]

[soulus]

It's best to be prepared for the worst.

[laid]

Ain't you worried at all, Rufus?

[Like, about anything.]

[soulus]

I would rather be productive than worried.

[laid]

I mean, sure, I think most of us would be. But most people gotta just live with bein' worried no matter what they want.

[soulus]

I dislike repeating myself.

[Once again, he is not most people.]

[laid]

Yeah yeah, well I'm just explainin' what us huddled mortal masses have ta deal with on a regular basis, yer majesty.
[This is teasing but also sort of not.]

[soulus]

That doesn't concern me.

[laid]

Well it should. Because like it or not you're probably stuck with the lot of us for a while yet.

[soulus]

In that case, I would prefer to discuss business.

[laid]

What business?

[Do other people have money??? He doesn't understand.]

[soulus]

The business of information exchange, of course.

[laid]

You say exchange but any time I try to get information out of you, ya dodge the question.

[soulus]

I will not answer questions that do not pertain to the Realm.

[laid]

Well why not?

[soulus]

Simply put, there would be no benefit to answering them.